Life Will Smile For You

On the 21st of September, I was eating some fried chicken with my best mate from high school. We were on a bullet train, on the way out of Tokyo because neither of us wanted to stay at home. Two days before that day, I broke up with my ex and also my mate left her ex; it was a strange coincidence but we knew exactly where we stood at that time. What we talked about was not the people we went out with, but about the emptiness of our minds; there were huge holes somewhere in our bodies, and it was physically hurting. It was a dull ache which makes you feel kind of lost. However, we had to get through it, because it’s a kind of thing you get after finishing a relationship with someone normally. We are both grown up enough as ladies to understand that, unfortunately. The window of the bullet train was covered by a curtain. We didn’t pay much attention to the scenery anyway. Before getting on the train, I bought some lunch for us. I had no appetite at all that day, so I bought fried chicken because I liked the painted chicken outside of the box. I assumed it was him, because it wore a bow tie, he flapped his wings and looked very arrogant, a kind of arrogance that comes from the chicken just being himself. It appealed to me at that time, I thought, I wish I had his confidence and indifference. Me and my mate were talking about the chicken, not like slagging off, but more objectively. It was pointless to blame the chicken for his arrogance, because he is a chicken.

“Imagine; you were on the train with this chicken.” I said.

“Yeah?” she said.

“The view from the window was all dark, nothing, because the train was in the tunnel.”

I said.

“OK.”

“And, it’s the endless darkness- you can’t see a thing from the window. It feels like forever.” I said.

“That’s depressing.” She said.

“Exactly, being in the dysfunctional relationship is like getting on the train with the chicken.” I said.

“You always say things that sound truthful, but really aren’t.” She said.

She knows me well. All of a sudden, I felt too much. Tears came out from my eyes and I was crying, because I just realized that I am no longer capable of staying a kid anymore. I had a bite of fried chicken and it tasted awful, then the next moment everything looked awful as the aftertaste in my mouth. My mate talked to me with her eyes saying, “Hey, you ok?” but instead of saying the words, he held my right hand. Here’s two grown ups in seats next each other, looking very lost. Just like our high school days. I drunk some coke with my empty hand and tried to forget everything.

Now, 16 days later from 21^st of September, I am madly in love with a person whom I didn’t even know 16 days ago. You really don’t know what’s around the corner, I mean it.

For the first time in my life, I truly believe that life is beautiful.